Thursday, February 25, 2010

Deep and Profound Brain Things

Last night I had an epiphany. This day could be my last day on earth! I am not saying this to be alarming in any way, but I have been doing my "exams" like a good aging woman should and a lump that was present at my last exam is still there. The Doc wasn't concerned then and I am not concerned now. However, this silly lump that seems to not be an issue, has caused much "deep and profound brain things inside my head" (Julian the Lemur King) and I have concluded that I am not living my life to its fullest. I have a mental list of things to do in my life and just not enough time! So, what if today is my last day. Am I loving enough? Living enough? Playing enough? Discovering enough? Sharing enough? Am I happy and let my face show it? Do my kids know how much they mean to me? Do I show them as much as I say it? Does my husband know that he is my life, the air I breath?

To answer each of these I can use 3 words, "Of course not!" So, what am I going to do about it? Well, I am still working on that. I am making a list, checking it twice, prioritizing, yada, yada; ultimately I want to be free! Free of pressure and responsibility and just live! Can you imagine with me for a moment if you never had to look at another bill, balance another account, attend another doctor appointment, spend another day inside, keep or a make obligations you don't want to, have a bed time, (the list could go on but I will stop there)? What would you do with this freedom? Think about it. I know I am.

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