Absent Minded

I completely forgot to tell you the whole reason why I posted the accident! Where is my mind these days?

So, about 2 hours later I was riding my bike back by the scene of the accident, which was still being investigated and cleaned and an attempt at bringing order back to the area. Just as I was coming out of the mess, the local freeloading bum that stands at the corner says in my direction with a smirk and chuckle, "Man I wish I had video taped that!" I simply shook my head and rode on by. I still cannot believe the nerve that man had! I shouldn't judge too harshly seen as how I don't know the intent of his filming the accident or how he felt 2 hours earlier having been witness to the accident. But come on! The accident isn't a joke, the lives of the people involved, the young idiot driving drunk at 10am, none of which sounds humorous or entertaining to me and I am appalled that the man with the "help me" sign would conjure up something so ridiculous as "I wish I had video taped it".

Maybe my issues aren't making much sense, I am just so upset that he found humor in it when for hours now I have been concerned for the people and have had little else on my mind. Maybe that is his coping mechanism for having witnessed it, but I just cannot joke about something as serious as life and death, especially when it involves an underage DUI.

Accidental Thoughts

This morning I left bright and early to ride over to Fred Meyer for a great clearance sale. I rode with a smile and though the wind was rather chilly, I was very happy to be out on my bike getting fresh air and exercise (not to mention how happy I was about saving so much money on some clothes for the kids). About a mile from my home I began hearing siren after siren. As I got closer to the main intersection I was able to see why so much commotion. Countless people had gathered along the street, emergency vehicles encircled what would be the worst accident I have ever laid eyes on. As I peddled through the masses I tried to catch a glimpse of the wreckage. I find it interesting how something so traumatic causes so much "rubbernecking" (such a funny word isn't it). Anyway, I wish I hadn't been there so soon after the wreck. Instinctively my hand shot off my handle bar to my mouth to cover my gasp. Just as quickly as my hand shot to my mouth, my hand shot my heart. I couldn't tell how many cars had piled up, but one car stood out among the heap, it was upside down and paramedics were swarming the driver's side. There was such chaos it was virtually impossible to tell what was what or make sense of the crash. When I got to the stop light and pressed the crosswalk button I had time to listen and catch glimpses of conversation between police officers and witnesses, I even chatted with one witness as she was waiting to go back across the street to her car. What I gathered was that it was a drunk driver going 60, ran a red light, swerved in and out of traffic, passing on the shoulder and median, and well, the rest is obvious.

You may be wondering why I post this today. Well, I can't stop thinking about the innocent victims who fell prey to an ignorant human. As I rode away from the wreckage my heart was drawn out in prayer for the victims and their families. I thought of the individual who made the ignorant choices that will change the lives of countless people. Yes, I felt sadness for this person as well. I can't help it, it is the social psychologist in me. What drove this person to drink so excessively, and at such an early hour might I add? I thought about how this person will feel when they recover from the affects of alcohol.

I find it shocking how one moment I am riding with a joyous disposition and the next my heart is aching. I know this was not the most joyous post, I just couldn't resist writing these thoughts. Has anyone else delved so deeply into the mind and heart of such individuals? What are your thoughts on the matter?

Deep and Profound Brain Things

Last night I had an epiphany. This day could be my last day on earth! I am not saying this to be alarming in any way, but I have been doing my "exams" like a good aging woman should and a lump that was present at my last exam is still there. The Doc wasn't concerned then and I am not concerned now. However, this silly lump that seems to not be an issue, has caused much "deep and profound brain things inside my head" (Julian the Lemur King) and I have concluded that I am not living my life to its fullest. I have a mental list of things to do in my life and just not enough time! So, what if today is my last day. Am I loving enough? Living enough? Playing enough? Discovering enough? Sharing enough? Am I happy and let my face show it? Do my kids know how much they mean to me? Do I show them as much as I say it? Does my husband know that he is my life, the air I breath?

To answer each of these I can use 3 words, "Of course not!" So, what am I going to do about it? Well, I am still working on that. I am making a list, checking it twice, prioritizing, yada, yada; ultimately I want to be free! Free of pressure and responsibility and just live! Can you imagine with me for a moment if you never had to look at another bill, balance another account, attend another doctor appointment, spend another day inside, keep or a make obligations you don't want to, have a bed time, (the list could go on but I will stop there)? What would you do with this freedom? Think about it. I know I am.

Tortillas

I cannot even tell you how many times I have tried to make homemade tortillas. They just keep turning out like a flat bread or thin peta. So, when I found some raw, uncooked tortillas for sale at Cost Co you cannot imagine how elated I was! Nothing beats a warm, fresh tortilla and they don't come easier than pre-made!

This evening the girls and I cooked us up a batch, burning the first half because it took that long to regulate the temperature. We spread fresh homemade refried black beans, cheese and salsa and voila! For dessert...coconut oil and honey on one tortilla and butter and cinnamon/sugar on the other! YUMMY YUMMY YUMMY! Took serious will power to stop myself from cooking up some more!

Morning Hike

Nothing clears the senses and the mood like a good brisk hike through the foothills. I feel as though the cobwebs are cleared and I am ready for another day.

New Layout

This will just have to do for now. I like it enough to tolerate. Plus my excellent words can now be read!

Stir Fry Night!

I admit I am not the best cook, but boy do I give it all I've got. I also admit that I am really good at taking someone else's recipe and making it my own. I love trying new recipes and rarely ever follow it to a T, unless it is full of new ingredients then I follow it exactly for the first time.

Tonight I made my first orange chicken stir fry. My recipe (I once heard if you make any changes it then becomes your recipe) goes as follow:

2 tsp minced garlic
1 tsp ginger (I ran out of fresh so I used powder, I found this to be too strong so I will either lessen the amount of dried or use fresh.)
1 whole orange squeezed (I will double this next time)
orange zest (My orange fell apart while squeezing so the amount of zest was very minimal this time, next time I will use a lot more!)
3/4 T vinegar (I only use Braggs Apple Cider Vinegar in my cooking, I don't see the point in having a cupboard full of different vinegars when one does just fine. Speaking of Braggs vinegar, remind me to write about my vinegar experience.)
1T soy sauce
1 1/2 C water (I like a lot of sauce with my stir fry and these measurements just didn't cut it for me. Next time I will double the sauce!)
2tsp brown sugar (this was plenty sweet enough, just needs more sauce!)
3-5 shakes of red pepper flakes (I really lost count, so that is why the numbers. My kids said it was too hot, I said I do that so they will drink more water at dinner!)

Broccoli (about 3 cups)
Carrots (about 1-2 cups)
I was going to throw in pea pods at the end and I forgot.

And of course Chicken.

(Just a side note: My husband just got home and ate some and said it was absolutely perfect, not to change a thing and that I am an excellent cook.)

A trick I have discovered through trial and error of making a lot of stir fry (one of my favorite things to eat) is to steam the veggies to my desired consistency and then put them in the bubbling sauce. Not only do I get perfect veggies but also I achieve it using no oil.

Today was my first experience cooking chicken in my new and loved pressure cooker. The chicken came out nice and tender! Plus it cooked really fast and I made enough for recipes in the coming days.

I like to add my chicken cubes to the bubbly sauce for a few moments before I stir in the steamed veggies so it can absorb some of the yumminess!

Well there you have it! I can't wait to eat the leftovers tomorrow!

Blog Layout Help

I thought I would try my hand at modifying html codes adjusting my new blog appearance, but it just doesn't have the curb appeal I had hoped for. The layout options are endless, but I the great picky one, have not found the perfect layout yet. I have seen a plethora of cutesy layouts that look like scrapbooks, a gazillion that just don't apply to my blog, and plain and simple that just don't shout, READ ME! My blog is so much of who I am inside that I don't want to come across boring or unapproachable. When I came across this new layout I absolutely fell in love! I saw and seriously longed to be right there! Which is exactly how I want my blog to feel. The problem with this new layout is that the words are really difficult to read. Do you agree or disagree?

I have widened the boxes containing all the writing but have yet to figure out how to make the box less transparent. Any clues out there on how to achieve this while still keeping the beautiful background image? I have given myself a headache over this one and I am going to have to throw in the towel for now. I hope to get some feedback from my readers. So, what do you think? Too difficult to read? Any code suggestions (this would be most appreciated)?

10 Day Fast - long enough to be a book!

I just completed a 10 day detox fast. Never before have I taken on such an endeavor. Many have asked, "Why would you do such a thing? Is is for health or spirit?" I will answer yes to both. Prior to starting the fast I had great hopes for the end results. I really had no idea what to expect from the very beginning. My sister coached me before I started and was "on call" throughout the remainder of the fast. The week before the fast I began a slight change in my diet. I stopped eating sugar and white flour and almost all dairy (which was limited in my diet to begin with). I also did a one day water fast, which by the way was really hard, in preparation for the 10 day fast. I also ate more veggies that I had around the house, which consisted of carrots, potatoes, canned green beans, and frozen peas and corn (nothing fantastic that is for sure).

Now, before I get into the day to day experiences I will attempt to explain why I did this in the first place. In 1997 I was single and living far from home all alone. I got very sick and didn't know what to do, so I saw a doctor and ingested my first antibiotics...ever! I didn't complete the whole prescription as counseled because, well, I was ignorant. A few months later I got sick again, worse than the last time. This sickness hung on me off and on for months there after. I happened to be living in an old apartment in North West New York at the time the 3 round hit. This particular apartment was, well, let's just say it was nasty. The bathroom was covered in black mold. Don't believe? When I moved in I thought the ceiling was painted black. I don't know what possessed me to not report the issue but none of the previous occupants seemed to mind so I ignored it as well. It was almost as if the mold was some sort of resident and no one wanted to kick it out. Long and painful story made short, I got even more sick. Hives morning, noon, and night plagued me. Nothing gave relief. I simply took the Benadryl to knock myself out, otherwise I was still covered in hives. These events in my life are not fond ones. I had never been so sick and uncomfortable in my life. Did I happen to mention I had an abscess tooth, food poisoning, and the recurring bronchitis at the same time? Ultimately my body was overloaded with toxins, and it has been that way ever since.

Just a couple weeks before I started the detox my husband turns to me with a book in hand and says with exaggerated enthusiastic sarcasm, "Listen to this! 'Retained debris in the colon leads to the absorption of toxins. Symptoms include mental confusion, depression, irritability, fatigue, gastrointestinal irregularities, and even allergic reaction such as hives" (Balch, 2000, p702). Doesn't that sound familiar?" I replied, "Ha ha ha, very funny, Yes it does". So, thanks to an ornery thoughtful husband, I began researching various ways to detox the body and came up with a colon cleanse kit by First Cleanse and the 10 day fast (which too can be found in Prescription for Nutritional Healing by Dr Balch).

Here are the list of physical conditions prior to the fast:

yellow eyes, poor complexion (have dealt with adult acne as long I am not pregnant!), constant bloating (our joke was to rub my belly like there was a baby in there), fatigue, hives controlled with a nightly dose of Zyrtec, stomach cramps after eating, excessive belching, indigestion, heartburn, extreme mood imbalances, and one stinky skunk armpit (no deodorant could mask it).

Following will be quick notes that I jotted on a daily basis during the fast. My memory is very poor because I was barely even mentally present during the whole thing.

This is what I ate: Organic fresh pressed fruit and veggie juices (store bought, who in their right mind would make their own while on this thing?), mixed 3 times a day with a hemp protein powder and organic coconut creme. Any time I was in need of nourishment I drank juice straight. I also started putting organic coconut oil on my face before bed. My complexion is beginning to take on a new look and feel.

Day 1 Rough start! I heard my husband come home, so I fell on the floor in a broke sprawled out sort of way with my tongue hanging out. He walked in, saw me, stepped over me, and laughed as he said, "rough day?"

Day 2 I was so hungry I thought I would puke. Everything I did, I did nice and slow!

Day 3 Much better today! I feel like I might make it. I had company around lunch time. I never realized how much energy it takes to talk! I became very weak, shaky, chilled and sweaty during visit and had to down some juice.

Day 4 Bloated belly diminishing. Had a very late night, so exhausted I wanted to puke (I didn't throw up once, although I felt like it several times throughout the entirety). I fell asleep crying and wondered if I should be doing this at all.

Day 5 Toxins begin to release (you don't want to know how I know). Did pretty good until 4pm, thought of giving up. I spent the day rather lazy like (watched 2 movies), barely completed my homework with the little brain power I had. This was the first day I began waking at 530 and couldn't go back to sleep, I stayed in bed and rested though because my eyes and body didn't want to be as awake as my brain (which doesn't make sense now that I think about it. I didn't even have much brain to even have awake!)

Day 6 It's all down hill from here! I tortured myself by baking some cookies for my family. My stomach has shrunk considerably and can tolerate the lack of food much better.

Day 7 My flat stomach is back! I feel thin again. Attended church with better results than I anticipated. About an hour before ending I began to feel nauseated, chilled, weak, and shaky.

Day 8 My eyes are clearing quite nicely.

Day 9 My body has adjusted tremendously! Much more clarity of mind...FINALLY! Really sick of juice (especially the fruit ones, all I want are the straight veggie ones). Read about dry brushing helps eliminate toxins. First dry brushing experience. Afterward I massaged coconut oil from head to toe. My skin was so incredibly soft, smooth and even firmer! I will incorporate this into my nightly routine from here on out!

Day 10 Hallelujah! Food was all I could think about. I planned a menu and grocery list for the days following the fast. My mind is so active and clear, I even submitted homework in an intellectual manner!

I have been off allergy meds for 3 weeks. I experienced a couple tiny tolerable hives the day I noticed toxins releasing, other than that I have been hive free!

This morning I went to the grocery store and bought a cart full of fresh fruits and veggies to make vegetarian meals for the rest of the week (I bought as much organic as possible). Just after checking out and walking back to my car, I realized I was smiling (I don't typically walk around smiling so this was a new feeling for me). As I approached my car I smiled even more as I reflected on what could possibly make me smile out of the blue. Within my grocery bag were things I had never eaten before, yet were the only thing I wanted, things that warmed my heart and soul! Is it possible that FOOD could have such an impact on a person? I am here to tell you it is. For ten days I lived on water and juice. Sometimes food was all I could think about. Other times I was too exhausted to move, let alone think. As I thought about the recipe I was going to make for my first solid lunch and the preparation required, I smiled even more. I reflected on starving individuals who have no food to eat. I thought of how I felt, for a measly ten days, and my heart went out to those who are starving their entire lives. As I drove home I cried, literally tears of joy, for food! Glorious food! Never in my entire life have I longed to eat. I thought of people who starve themselves not out of lack of food but because of their self image (or for whatever other reasons one might have an eating disorder). My heart was surprisingly more full than my stomach possibly ever could be. When I returned home I went straight to my husband and said, "Words cannot describe how I feel!" He said, "That bad huh?" I replied, "No, that good!" That peaked his interest enough to put aside the complicated mathematical equations (that appeared to me as a foreign language) he had been slaving over for 4 hours. I held him and told him, with a tear in my eye, how happy I was to have food to eat! He said I was the cutest thing on the whole darn planet.

For the next hour, with gratitude and tender feelings, prepared a lunch I would be sharing with a new friend. Never before have I prepared a meal with such feelings! Each slice and dice was in gratitude! In addition to these surprising feelings, I was preparing food I had never dreamed of eating, let alone preparing! I was never a huge eater of veggies, however, veggies are not the only thing I am aloud to eat (transitioning back to solid food) for the next two days, it is the only thing I WANT to eat!

My lunch recipe:

black beans (just made in my new pressure cooker)
corn
tomato
avocado
cilantro (used to hate it, now I love it!)
green onion (hated, really like now!)
basil (never had fresh before, YUM!)
oil (wished I had the olive oil it called for, used canola instead)
lime

My first bite was not as delicious as I had hoped. HOWEVER, every bite there after was D-LISH! I grew to love it so much I brought the whole big bowl with me to munch on while I type! When my youngest got home from school (she is my veggie lover) she saw the bowl and began devouring it!

To end this lengthy post I want to say this: I believe everyone should do a ten day fast at some point in their lives! The physical benefits are not even fully known to me at this time. I do know that I feel better (physically, emotionally/spiritually, and mentally), I look better, and boy do I have a new appreciation! I liken my body right now to a shiny clean house. You all know what hard work goes into cleaning a house. When the house is clean you require everyone to take their shoes off at the door, no spills are allowed, and absolutely no clutter to be left lying around. I never want to dirty up my body again with junk food, fast food, bleached food, canned food, frozen food, or boxed food; pretty much everything located in the center isles of a grocery store!

Well, there you have it! My ten day fast!